ASD · Autism · Aydan's Life · Depression · LGBT · Mental Illness · Religion · Suicide · Transgender

Nothing

The hardest part of my life is seeing people around me constantly having the world move to benefit them. It doesn't matter if they work hard or not at all, all the pieces of the puzzle seems to slip effortlessly into place and their lives improve while mine continues to deteriorate. I've had fantastic ideas… Continue reading Nothing

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Aydan's Life

A New Kind of Normal

I've never really had anything close to a social life, even when I was in high school. Even though I'm an extrovert I've spent most of my life in a reclusive state. Part of this is the fact that I am transgender, and the discrimination that I've faced because of it, part of it is… Continue reading A New Kind of Normal

Depression · Healthcare · Mental Health · Mental Illness · Suicide · Transgender · Transgender Health

Major Depressive Disorder…

For over half of my life I’ve been depressed, not just the cause kind of depression that so many people suffer, I’m not that lucky. I have had this deep rooted, dark miasma of a mental illness since I was fifteen years old. The first time I told my mom I was depressed, she said… Continue reading Major Depressive Disorder…

Literature · Poetry

Sanity Piracy

(I've been going through a lot of my old journals and notebooks with poetry that I had wrote several years ago. Some of it is dated 2008! The difference in the person I was then and the person I am now is astounding. So I thought I might share some of my poetry over the… Continue reading Sanity Piracy

A Broken Country · All Lives Matter · Anti-LGBT Laws · Anti-Transgender Laws · ASD · Autism · Depression · Discrimination · Family · Government · LGBT · Mental Health · Mental Illness · Suicide · Transgender · Transgender Visibility

Empty

The evening before last I had fully intended to kill myself. I was, and frankly still am, tired of the struggle. I’m tired of nothing ever seeming to get better no matter how hard I fight. I’m tired of seeing facebook post after facebook post of states in the US making laws that blatantly descriminate… Continue reading Empty

Aydan's Life · Depression · Mental Health · Mental Illness · Suicide

Razor’s Edge

I’m depressed. I know this and yet there is nothing that I can do to drag myself from the darkness. Each passing day I sink deeper and I’m left wondering why I even bother anymore. Some nights when I go to sleep I pray that I don’t wake up in the morning so the pain… Continue reading Razor’s Edge

ASD · Autism · Aydan's Life · Depression · Family · Holidays · LGBT · Mental Health · Mental Illness · Suicide · Transgender

Reflection

I will be glad when 2015 is over, this has been the worse year of my life by far. The entire year I’ve spent dealing with one clusterfuck after another, and the day before Christmas was just hell. I am depressed and have to keep reminding myself what I have to live for. I found… Continue reading Reflection