LGBT · Transgender

Transitioning, Sexism and Outdated Gender Roles

I started my life some 31 years ago with the sexual characteristics of a female. This is not to say that I am female, just that I have most of the same parts. I began my transition over two years ago in March of 2013 and sense then I have faced discrimination not only when I disclosed my transgender identity but also when nearly any woman percieved me as a heterosexual cis-gendered male. While being percieved this way was initially my orginial goal, as I came to understand and accept myself more and more, this was less of a concern for me.

A few of this biggest and for me the most upsetting things I noticed is the immediate distrust of me if I mention that someone has a beatiful baby. Before my transition, if I was percieved as female and complimented a mother on her baby she would often strike up a conversation about the child and just about give me the child’s life story. However now that I am perceived as male, if I tried to approach a mother with an infant and make a pleasant remark, I’m glared at and scuttered away from. In that instant that I open my  mouth to give these women a compliment I am automatically marked as a threat because I am male. I cannot possibly know anything about children or have any positive input when it comes to children simply because I am a man.  Also, the dirty looks that I get from people when I attempt to compliment something that they are wearing. It is like because I am male I am incapable of being nice, caring or genuine without having an alterier motive. Nearly every time I have faced situations like these,  the other party involved has been a woman. Talk about sexism! I am instantly judged and deemed a threat not because of any aggressive actions or threats but merely because I am male.

I have realized from my immersion into the male world that male privilege is nothing more than a fallacy. Men are expected to forfeit everything for the sake of family, property and country, yet women are not demanded or expected to. Take the military selective service for example, all males are required to register for the draft within 30 days of their 18th birthday. Even though in 2011 about 14.5% of military personnel in active duty were women, the selective service is still restricted for men only. So, the people of the United States can justify throwing away the lives of our young men, if another draft is instituted but not our young women? Where is the equal protect promised by the US Constitutuion for those young men that face the threat of a draft should we enter in another war like Vietnam or the World Wars?

Men are expected to work long hours for little to no pay to support their families, and they are the ones that society says must support the family. If the father in a household stays at home with the children while the mother works, the father is automatically deemed a failure or unworthy of having the family in the first place. Then, if the parents of a child should split,  only about 10% of the time does the father get custody of the child no matter if he has a more stable home or not. In some cases the pregidous against fathers is so bad that in order for the father to get custody the mother would have to pull a page straight out of the Exorcist screenplay and masturbate with a cross while screaming “let Jesus fuck you”. Once again, the idea is that the father is uncapable of child rearing because he is male.

When you play into the idea that men are evil and women are good no matter the character of those men and women, you continue to play into a sexist ideal. Neither gender is evil nor good on the basis of their gender alone, and a person should not be judged by what the do or do not have between their legs. 

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